Posts Tagged ‘strenth’

  ( A follow up too Proud to be who I am)
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        ( The Scots Guards on Parade)

I know how hard it is to be bullied and be made fun of all to well. Personally it made school hard as hell,from Primary (junior) school to University. Having everyone including your peer group on your back day in day out. Kids on your street,block or estate harang your every movement.
  Did I hide in a corner or skulk in shadows !! . No I did not, I done the hardest thing I could have choosen too do. I stood upto the bullies and sooth sayers. Not by violance at first but by using my wit,inteligance and speed of thought. Turning round or manipulating there own words or position, A verbal Karate,Ikido or judo if you like.
  This is by no means easy although once you start you dont realise at the time how hard it is. As I am only seeing know how strong I must have been to attempt this.
  It is not cheek,stupid remarks or idiotic behaviour that you use, it is how ever jokes(about youself) aswell as them,word games,inteligance about the situation and grit and determination.
   Disarming or even nutralising there point of view making others laugh and without realising changing perspectives of you ( who you are, why you are,how you feel and what you will not stand for). There are no classes in this unfortunatly or everyone would be doing it.
  And not all the tormentors or torment will stop , but it will put you in a far better mental,social and interpersonal place. That one day you could be writing this or speaking to others on any subject?
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Through my operations I missed a lot of school,but with hard work and help I caught up and passed my exams rising me above these people scared of the unknown(me). I first joined the Army as a Junior Leader (the picture top of page) thats where that chaprter began.
  All these people saying because of my face and that I was a freak and hey you guys (from the Goonies). To name but a few where are they what have they done !!!!.
  A lot I know personally know have made there peice and we have buried hatchets. A lot didnt do well at school,have been in and out of jail(correctional facilities),taken drugs ect. They marvel at my acheivements and wonder why and how !!.
  They have lived with regret,anger and self pitty around there actions. And I forgave them and thanked them for what they had done. With a smile a hug and even a pint or three.
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There are those hard lined bigots out there that you can not change or get through too. That is not your fault it is down to them wholely and fully.

Forgive yourself before others and follow your path. Take those friends and believers with you.Leave doubters,haters and spoilers to languish in there own pitty.

FORGIVENESS IS YOUR GREATEST WEAPON

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Born 1st August 1974 with a complex disfigurement of the skull. Similar to a cleft palate but in my forehead. My eyes were positioned round towards my ears, a 4″ inch ravean in my forehead,2 bumps positioned on my eyebrow line just above my nose. And my nose was the same length as the width of an average thumb.
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From the age of 7 1982 I started a long and winding set of Maxifacial operations. Performed at the Southern General Hospital Glasgow,by the same team as Operated on the boy David from Brazil. Apart from Dr Thomson who adopted david.
  The first Operation was a 18 and a half hours on the operating table. 27 days recovery in intensive care and 4 further weeks on the childrens ward. A further 50+ operations followed untill the age of 14 1988.
  Bullied daily because I was different and people were scared of the unknown. Daily repetative name calling,pushing,shoving and worse. Where I grew up you either fought back got strong,or curled up and gave in.
  
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Yes I stood out in the crowd and I was the odd man out. But hey how amazing can that be !! , let me explain , I have an inbuilt story. Mother nature dealt me this oddity aswell as strong mental ability , broad shoulders and a stubborn streak. I had and still do have an answer for everything,sence of humour and determination to prove people wrong.
  Yes the daily battle was painful,depressing,hurtful,questionable,distroying but charactor building, drive building, powerful,Spiritual and friendship building. I know all too well that it is hard and people children especially are cruel and petty. Yes even now at nearly 40 I still get strange looks name calling ect.
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Here is the best part I have served my country 10+ years as Guardsman and Marine , been a NHS Nurse , Coached sport at all levels,qualified as a Physio,personal Trainer, Traveled 3 quarters of the world and got married with 4 gorgious children. There is a brighter side to all the anguish and hurt.
  And I know everyone is different but we are also the same I chose to make my victimisation work for me instead of putting me down. I rose up and grew into who I am now
This Strong,polite,personable,educated and grounded person. I personally am thankful to all my bullies,doubters and haters Family,enemy or stranger alike.
  You are and always have been the wind in the sails of this great ship that has sailed above and beyond that of most of your lives. I have no regrets or hang ups at all yes I am hard on myself and sometimes put myself down too much (some who may read this know this well) but I am here and doing things my way despite it all ;).

PLEASE ANYONE BEING PERSICUTED OR BULLIED BY OTHERS SEEK HELP
(Talk to someone deal with you first ignore and become deaf to the doubters and haters) Rise like the Pheneix and show your guiding light.